Husband Love

To Jon on Valentines Day

Husband-love, this is God’s
Grace-gift to me,

For husband-love lives Father-God’s love,
making God real to me.

Before husband-love,

I knew pseudo-love—
Love that says “I love you”
But lives “I love self.”

I knew false-love in the name of Love.

I’d never felt Fearless love,

Love that sacrifices Self for the Soul of another,
Love that mirrors God-love: perfect love
That casts out fear.

So when You lived patient love,

waiting for this foolish-fearful heart,
to trust in real Love,
waiting five years,
weathering three break-ups,
two “Dear Jon” letters,
and my sloppy-hurtful words,  
always pointing to the One
who loved me best, loved me perfectly,
Slowly, I began to see:
this lived-out Love,
Rooted in sacrifice of Self,
Rooted in trusting God,
casting out fearful
grasping, pushing, pulling,
forcing of Self before Soul is ready,
this was
Real Love.

So when we finally said “I do” on that

Bright June morning, in 2002, this I knew:
I trusted You because You first Loved me,
And I wanted to love You too.

And you’ve lived Love through good times
And bad: through seminary days, joyful
birthing days and weary new-born-baby days,
through three miscarriages and the
shattering of family,
through joy and through pain, 
through this broken-fearful heart
learning
how to let go of Self
and love you,
love our sons,
love the God
who sacrificed his very own Son
for Love of me.

And it’s Your love—

Husband-love—
That points me to this greatest
Love.

And You—

my husband, my Love,
Are God’s
most precious
Grace-gift to me.

I John 1: 9 This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. ¹⁰ This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

1 John 4:18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.